another day in the kenoma

How can I escape? My new years resolutions were complicated and discussed over a drink with M in the wonderful location of Portland (the other one). But the simple online version of it will be that I resolve to truly look inward. I've been trying to get into the basement with a flashlight and all that for a minute now but I reckon within the last year, or past decade or past 28 years of my life I've gotten a better handle on how exactly it is I might do that, and how exactly the pleroma or your mom or however else you might like to refer to that "thing" might stare back at me if I stare into it long enough, which is called meditation. I haven't quite worked up the nerve, as usual, to out and out meditate, but I think I know how to do it, and I suppose I am, even though I haven't paid David Lynch his TM money yet, and don't know if I ever will because I learned how to bounce in kindergarten.